Intervention letter writing can be a heart wrenching exercise. It’s an attempt to defeat the denial of a loved one who is inside active addiction. Interventions, due to their nature, cannot be spontaneous. They’re often a last effort by family and friends to help an addict realize that they are loved, cared for, but that their behavior is causing serious negative consequences not only to the addict’s life, but in others as well. We discussed the intervention letter, with some tips that continue here.
Intervention Letter Writing Tips continued
Part III: Talk about how your loved one’s drug abuse is affecting you. In this section, you need to stick to facts. You can add how the addict’s behavior is hurting you emotionally, but the unarguable facts are the best way to go. Sure, your loved one with addiction problems will still argue, or try to argue. That’s the nature of addiction. When your loved one does get into treatment, you’ll hear that phrase a lot. “It’s the nature of the disease”. People often get very defensive when others point out to them that their addiction is hurting others. Responses like “You don’t have to love me,” or, “I can do what I want with my body and my time,” are common. It’s not at all uncommon for an addicted loved one to try to disown their whole family during an intervention. Ignore that and stick to the facts.
Part IV: You Ask Your Loved One to Get Help. Remember, you’re making an offer to help your loved one get help. You’re not simply aiming for your loved one to admit that they need help. You ask your loved one to get help. You do not simply say, “we think you need help”. You ask, not demand, your loved one seek treatment. Match that with the offer to help your loved one actually go through the mechanics of getting into care.
Part V: Consequences. If the addict refuses help, there are consequences to that action. These consequences need to be directly related to the addict’s drug use. If you’re the parent of an adult addict and you’re supporting them financially, let them know that you’re going to reduce or cut off the money you’re giving them. That’s hard. Remember though, if you arrange life for the addict so that there’s no consequences for their actions or inactions, you’re enabling them to stay ill.